The Young and the Restless

Recently I had the honor of sitting down with about a dozen young adults that were primarily 22-23 years old. All but one of them was a recent college graduate. They all were involved in a prototype atypical church-type ministry. All had jobs in the community and saw themselves as missionaries in their attempt to realize a New Testament Church.

Miriam and I offered to host an ice cream party in exchange for the opportunity to ask them two questions. I asked, “What do you think the Church, however you have experienced it, is doing well or poorly?” and “What do you wish Lead Pastors knew that they don’t seem to grasp?” I learned a great deal from them and if you want to hear what 20-somethings are thinking, keep on reading.

  1. I wish people in church cared more about Jesus. Yes, there are many in the church who attend worship more frequently than I do but their church attendance does not translate into a Monday through Saturday difference. The majority who attend church on Sunday don’t seem to care that people are lost, that Christ calls them to love the poor and needy and that Christ calls us to love our neighbor. It is hard for me to see their hands raised on Sunday and their fist clenched on Monday. Lesson Learned: If you want to reach 20-somethings, your congregation needs to reflect a weeklong passion for Christ.
  2. I wish there was more room for our unique gifts. It seems when we show up in church that the first thing people want to know is if we will be a greeter or usher. I have no interest in either. When I offer my interest in arts, media or technology, most places have no clue how to use my gifts and then they ask if I want to be a greeter again. Lesson Learned: Within the context of your churches mission, find new and creative ways to use creative people.
  3. I wish churches understood that I don’t care as much about style as they think I do. I care more about the mission of God in my community than I do about the methods used to attract me. Don’t get me wrong, I can’t stand mediocrity in worship but I can’t stand a worship that makes no impact on the missional engagement in the community during the week. If you want me to come back to your church, have quality worship that makes a difference in how I live during the week. Lesson Learned: We have replaced, “If you build it they will come.” with “If you sing it / light it / play a guitar, they will come.” We need to consider, “If we love the less fortunate and serve together with them, they will come.”
  4. I can’t stand the racial or generational boxes that people put us in. I used to hate being labeled a Millennial but now I don’t take it as offensively as I once did. I know people are just trying to figure out a way to identify who we are. We love people of all ages and races. We love hanging out with them but are rarely given an opportunity to do so. Yes, we like hanging out with our friends so don’t take that away. However, we love learning about other people, their experiences and their cultures. Lesson Learned: We need to seriously consider intergenerational and culturally aware approaches to ministry.
  5. I wish pastors knew the challenges I face at work. I live in the constant tension of trying to communicate my love for Christ while staying out of the Human Resources Office. My pastor merely recognizing this challenge would be such an encouragement to me. If he / she could help me know how to manage the tension, it would be a bonus. Lesson Learned: Pastors are taught about the unique challenges of pastoral ministry and are hopeful that our people will understand those challenges. It is more important that we take the time to discover the challenges our people face at work and understand those challenges. It will make us better able to empathize with our people and, hopefully, make our preaching connect more deeply.

Several of my blog posts talk about the power of listening. Ecclesiastes 5:1-2 (ESV) says, “Guard your steps when you go to the house of God. To draw near to listen is better than to offer the sacrifice of fools, for they do not know that they are doing evil. Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word before God…” Take some time to listen to a person who is young and restless and you will learn a great deal about your world…and even learn more about Jesus in the process.